Keeping counters clear

I am going to be brutally honest and vulnerable here… My kitchen counter was a mess. Not the whole counter, mind you, just the part of it that was on the edge between the kitchen and the living area, right next to the pantry. But things had begun piling up, and the law of entropy kicked in – once things start piling up, the pile attracts more and more things. It’s just physics. It goes beyond “flat surfaces are clutter magnets” because once the first few items have been set down, your brain unconsciously sees it as an invitation to just put more stuff there (one or two more things won’t matter, right?), and then it’s a complete mess.

So when I absolutely couldn’t stand it anymore, I did the only reasonable thing: I took myself on as a client. Meaning, I stopped just letting this pain point exist, I detached myself from the situation, and I looked at it the same way I would look at a client’s kitchen to come up with a solution. Here’s my process.

1- What types of items are on this counter?

Figuring out what types of items make up the clutter is crucial to figuring out how to stop them from piling up! In this case, I had two big categories: electronics (that spot is where we put the tablets and chargers because it’s super convenient) and pantry overflow (things that had not been put away in the pantry properly). The pantry overflow started because I had a big canister that I meant to replace with a smaller one, but I procrastinated and left it out on the counter. Clutter is just unmade decisions, right? And from that moment onward, various items that belonged in the pantry just settled down to live on the counter with the big canister – either they didn’t make it back into the pantry after being used, or they were not put away with the rest of the groceries.

2- Figure out a solution for those types of items!

Alright, the electronics are there to stay, so let’s make it work. I went to The Container Store and looked at a bunch of trays and shallow bins before settling on a water hyacinth basket that looked good to me. Now, the tablets and chargers live in that basket. This works because not only do things stay corralled in there, but they also visually come across as having been put away where they belong rather than left out on a countertop.

As for the pantry overflow, I finally got that smaller canister that fits in the pantry. A few items were consumed as intended, some were returned where they belong, and I made a larger spot in the pantry for backstock to help prevent this situation.

3- Evaluate the solution

To prove my point that clutter attracts clutter, I didn’t tell my family members what I was doing, nor did I give them specific instructions for maintenance. They liked the basket and instinctively understood that electronics go in there. Because there was no clutter on the counter, things no longer piled up there unnoticed. After two weeks, I took another picture to show how it’s going. Two extra things made their way back: one is my husband’s glass of water, which he just always puts down in that spot, and that’s fine. The other is a bottle of supplements to stir in water for one of our kids – it’s just way more practical to have it there instead of in the dining room with the other supplements, so that’s where it lives now. And that’s it!

4- Tweak as needed

Things change in our life – right now we’re in a season where we use those supplements, but eventually we won’t need them anymore. Maybe it’ll be something else left out on the counter instead, and we’ll have to tweak the system to suit our situation at that point. Or maybe I would have needed to reevaluate the solutions I came up with if they had not been working well for us – that happens, and it’s normal. But I think we’ve got it handled for now!

Care tasks are neutral

I recently listened to a really great episode of the podcast Ten Percent Happier, titled Messiness Is Not a Moral Failing, with therapist KC Davis (of Struggle Care) as a guest. I’d like to give you some takeaways from the episode as well as my opinion on it.

KC Davis Author Photo 2022 © Julie Soefer

First, let’s define an important term: “care tasks.” Care tasks are things that we need to do to maintain our home/ourselves, but they are never finished in that they are cyclical. For example, I could wash all the dishes and be done with that task (until the next meal, that is), but while I did that, the kids made a mess with their toys. If I pick it up, there will still be the bathroom to clean and the laundry to do, and while I was taking care of that, the dust was settling in the bedroom and the grass was getting long outside… You see where I’m going with this? There’s always something to be done, and that’s alright – we have to learn to live with that.

So, care tasks should be neutral. What I mean by that, what this whole episode was about, is that we often feel guilty or ashamed for not doing enough of those tasks, or we force ourselves to do them a certain way to live up to imaginary standards. Not doing the dishes doesn’t make one a bad person, just like doing all of them doesn’t make one more virtuous. If this is a pain point for you, ask yourself why you want the dishes done in the first place. Strictly speaking, what you *need* are enough clean dishes to eat and prepare meals; that’s the basic health and safety issue. Perhaps the sight of dirty dishes also bothers you, and you would be more comfortable without them in the way. Some people are happier cleaning as they go, so that they never have dirty dishes pile up; other people will be stressed out by that and will be happier setting aside a chunk of time to tackle everything (or at least the essentials) at the end of the day. The trick is to stop passing judgement on ourselves for having dirty dishes in the first place, and to learn to be at peace with whatever system we choose for cleaning dishes. If it’s the sight of dirty dishes in the sink that bothers you, but you can’t clean as you go for whatever reason, then we can come up with other solutions, like storing dirty dishes in the dishwasher, or even rinsing dishes and storing them in a drying rack until they can be washed properly, thus freeing up your sink in the meantime. The point is to reassess your priorities and put your energy where it will have the most impact.

As another example, so many people feel ashamed of their clothes chair, but I think you should embrace it if it’s functional! Remember that you don’t exist to serve your space, but your space exists to serve you. So we need to create systems that are functional for *you*, even if that’s not the way you were taught that things *should* be. I have a client who stores her young daughter’s clothes in the closet of the main bedroom, because that’s just where her daughter gets dressed anyway and that’s what works for them. I have a friend who doesn't fold any clothes for her family of 6 because she absolutely hates folding, and everyone still has clean clothes to wear every day (taken from a bin or a hanger). Sometimes there can also be a problem to solve, like if your dirty clothes always end up on the floor of the bathroom instead of in the hamper in the bedroom. Then I’d say to simply put the hamper in the bathroom (and even consider a lidless hamper, because for some people, removing that little obstacle can make all the difference).

Any change that we want to bring to our life should come from a place of caring for ourselves and should bring joy to our life. Take the pressure off and know that you are worthy of resting! For me, cooking is like that – I don’t necessarily enjoy the act of cooking, but I do like eating well, so cooking most of my own food improves my life in that way. My “hack” is that I always cook enough food to have leftovers for a second meal. So I put in about the same effort, but reap twice the rewards, and because I don’t mind leftovers, this works for me. I have redefined the goal to what serves me (i.e., having nourishing food instead of cooking from scratch every single night). Redefining the goal to something that is realistic and functional for *us* is key!

Another thing that struck me is that KC Davis doesn’t believe that laziness exists. Some people won’t do a particular task because they have ADHD, depression, or a physical illness; some are in a season of their life where they must care for small children or are grieving; others get overwhelmed by the thought of starting a task or simply have different priorities. In any case, we should feel self-compassion instead of shame, and aim for good enough instead of perfect. It’s also really important to do that work in order to figure out to what extent clutter bothers you – do the sight and chaos of it truly overwhelm you, or were you just worried about what others might think if they were to see it? I’m all about making things functional before making them look good, so if you can still find everything despite a little clutter, then don’t beat yourself up about it.

Some care tasks can be outsourced. Decluttering is a care task too. We all have to declutter periodically (yes, even me!), and us professional organizers are in a good position to be non-judgmental with our clients and their clutter. I tend to see it as problem-solving. Some clients want me to set up a system that they can maintain themselves, while others need me for periodic maintenance. It’s fine either way – I’m happy to help!