Gifting without the clutter
We all want to give gifts without creating clutter for the recipient. And when we come across something we just know they will love, it’s like everything falls into place! But what if we simply don’t know what to give them? I’m thinking of someone whose gifts from his father have consistently missed the mark for the last 20+ years, and I’m sure we would all like to avoid similar situations!
This photo was taken by Jess Bailey for Unsplash.
It turns out that gifts must actually fill two purposes: please the recipient, but also please the giver. The recipient might prefer meaningful or practical gifts, while the giver will often focus on the “wow factor” when the recipient unwraps the gift, instead of on the pleasure the recipient will have when they use the gift in the weeks, months, or years to come. The giver will also want to find a gift that aligns with their own tastes and values – someone who reads only fiction will not instinctively be drawn to gifting self-help books or biographies, despite the recipient’s own preferences.
One thing that my family has always done, and that is apparently controversial for some, is to create wish lists. Some people are completely opposed to the idea because to them, surprising the recipient is part of the fun. However, research actually shows that recipients are happier when they get what they wanted in the first place! And isn’t that what giving should really be about, making the recipient happy? We always take the time to write our own wish list and to ask our loved ones what they would like. (An online wish list has the added advantage of avoiding duplicate gifts, which are disappointing for all parties involved.)
As adults, my husband and I have reached the point where there aren’t always many material possessions that we want. Our wish list will therefore include items like an experience: a restaurant meal, concert tickets, a spa treatment, a magazine subscription, a class or workshop, or even a weekend getaway are all possible options. Experiences often make people happier than material goods, anyway. Creating a wish list is itself a joyful experience, because we go through the anticipation and visualization process of getting those things we really want.
With our children, I like to encourage decluttering before the holidays, which not only helps create more room for incoming presents, but can also help our kids verbalize what they would want. They might get rid of a toy because it is broken but ask for a replacement, or they might decide that they want more building blocks of a specific brand because they enjoy them so much, or they might realize that a certain type of toy has been outgrown and is no longer interesting to them. (We donate all items that are still in good condition, which is why I prefer doing this before the holidays so that other kids can enjoy them then, but of course decluttering after the holidays is still a great idea!)
This photo was taken by Valentin Petkov for Unsplash.
When it comes to giving items to people we don’t know very well, or at least not well enough to ask them for a wish list, I like to choose things that are overall crowd-pleasers and that don’t create clutter. Some favorites include gourmet food or gift cards (to a restaurant, a favorite store, or something fun like the movie theater). These are usually superficial enough that they can be enjoyed by most people (or regifted, at worst), and they do not create clutter. That being said, research shows that something with even broader appeal could be better (say, a gift card to Amazon or Target or a Visa gift card, so that the recipient can get what they really want).
Finally, I will leave you with some words from Marie Kondo: “The purpose of a gift is to be received.” If you receive a gift that underwhelms you, make sure to thank the giver for their kindness, because it was indeed nice that they thought of you. You can try using the gift to see if it grows on you, but if it doesn’t, do not feel obligated to keep it! The giver would not want to burden you with it. Feel free to pass it on to someone else who could use it.
By the way, you can see my previous blog post with ideas for Advent calendar options that won’t create clutter!
Hi there! I’m Amélie, a professional home organizer in San Antonio, Texas. I help people like you declutter their home, organize their belongings, and simplify their life. I love cleaning out a closet and removing a carload of donations from a home! My goal is to help you create a functional space that will make your life easier and more peaceful.
Interested? Check out my personalized services or book your complimentary consultation!
